In our previous article, we've explored the
nature of healthy and unhealthy anxiety. In a nutshell, social anxiety
is an excessive fear triggered by the impression that others will judge
and shame you. Most of us choose to avoid such situations in order to
relieve ourselves of the intense pressure caused by anxiety. What we
don't understand is that this strategy is actually doing more harm than
good.
Avoiding is not a good strategy for many reasons. First of all, it's
only a matter of time before we have to face a social situation once
again. Second, by avoiding social contexts, we lose valuable networking
opportunities. In order to live happy and successful, we need the help
of others and social anxiety can be a major roadblock. Here's how some
of the most common signs of social anxiety can affect our day-to-day
lives.
Self-Consciousness
Being extremely preoccupied
with your image is one of the basic characteristics of socially anxious
individuals. You're constantly worried that people will evaluate you, so
you jump through hoops for their approval. Being overly concerned about
how others see you will completely drain your energy. You spend
countless hours working on your self-image, and you're still not
satisfied with the result. Some people are self-conscious about their
weight or physical appearance, while others are worried about their
mental abilities. Does this sound familiar? "I don't go to the pool
because I'm fat and people will laugh at me" or "I won't answer the
teacher's question because I might be wrong and he'll think that I'm
stupid". These are some typical anxiety-related thoughts.
Fear of Humiliation
One
of the biggest fears of socially anxious individuals is that they will
be publicly humiliated. If you struggle with social anxiety, being
laughed at feels like the end of the world. You don't want people to
notice your imperfections because you think that they'll laugh at you.
When you're out in public, you feel like everyone is looking at you.
Slowly, you decide to step back and enjoy the comfort and safety of your
home.
Watch Out for Social Isolation!
Avoidance and
social isolation are some of the worst consequences of social anxiety.
Humans are social creatures which were able to evolve and adapt mostly
through collaboration. In our complex, fast-growing society, being an
island is completely counterproductive.
Sweating, Trembling, and Blushing
Besides
the symptoms mentioned above, social anxiety is also accompanied by an
entire array of physical symptoms. The most common ones are sweating,
blushing and trembling. This usually happens when you're in a social
context like for example: public speeches, parties, meetings or even
shopping at the local store. You pick up a box of cereals and you
suddenly drop it because your hands are shaking. This event draws the
attention of other people which makes you sweat and blush intensely.
Do Symptoms Influence Each Other?
What
we're trying to say is that one symptom triggers another and you can
even end up having a panic attack. The main reason why these symptoms
appear is because you're too focused on yourself.
Staying Quiet and Hiding in a Corner
Whenever
you go to a party, it's always easy to spot the anxious ones. They're
usually somewhere in the corner of the room, leaning against the wall
and desperately avoiding eye contact by checking their phones every
minute. If you're dealing with social anxiety, being noticed by someone
is an absolute nightmare. You simply don't want to attract attention. In
some cases, the symptoms might be so severe that you won't even have
the nerves to attend a party. As we mentioned earlier, not being able to
socialize and interact with other people can be a huge drawback. You
miss out on valuable networking opportunities that might be beneficial
on a personal and professional level.
Soothing Your Nerves with Alcohol or Other Substances
For
hundreds of years, people have been using alcohol as a 'treatment' or
'solution' to their problems. It's not uncommon for anxious people to
have a couple of drinks just to 'take the edge off'. By acting as a
sedative, alcohol takes your mind off of troubles and puts you in a good
mood. Besides alcohol, many anxious individuals also use psychotropic
substances like marijuana, ecstasy or amphetamines. The effects of these
substances are similar to anti-anxiety medication. Just like avoidance,
this strategy is only a short-term solution. Unfortunately, using
substances to cope with your social anxiety leads to disastrous endings.
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